Questions for February 27

Opening
Review announcements and open with prayer and singing, if someone wants to lead and the group is on board. 

Learn It
Read Ephesians 5:21-33 to start your discussion...

Busting Marriage Myths!  (From “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts,” Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott)

Myth # 1: We have the same expectations from marriage.

• Think about your box of experiences and expectations that your bring into marriage.  Name some of the most significant ones...
• Name the unnamed rules you expect your spouse to follow  (Never show up late, sort the recyclables, hang up your coat...)
• Maybe even come up with your own “Top Ten List” of rules that you would like to be followed in the home.

• Name the unnamed roles you expect you and your spouse to fulfill (the Driver, the Bill-Payer, the Gift-Buyer...)
• Try to define the Top Three roles for each spouse.

Myth #2: Everything Good Gets Better in Marriage

• Marriage is filled with wonderful blessings, but perhaps even more responsibilities.  What are some of the hard realities of life together?  How do you deal with disappointments and let-downs?
• In marriage we change: from newlyweds, to first time parents, to empty nesters, and numerous stages in between.  How will you navigate the changes in marriage, in your spouse, and in yourself?

Myth # 3: Everything Bad Disappears After Marriage

• Marriage does not make life “happily ever after.”  We still experience pain, suffering, brokenness and sin.  What do you do with the hard reality that marriage doesn’t fix everything?
• What do you do with a spouse that wants you to fix everything wrong in his/her life?
• Sometimes couples need therapy.  But many find that marriage is itself a kind of therapy, helping us to examine, understand and improve ourselves.  Share examples of how marriage has been therapy for you...

Myth # 4: My Spouse Completes Me

1. Enmeshed Relationships are characterized by an over reliance on your spouse, low self-esteem, and one overly dominant partner.
2. Disengaged Relationships are characterized by two highly independent spouses living in isolation.  These persons also suffer from low self-esteem.
3. Interdependent Relationships find a health balance of self-respect, respect for your spouse, and a commitment nurture one another in life and faith.

• How would you characterize yourself, and if married, your spouse and your marriage?

Close with a time of prayer for one another.