Sorry: The Game of Sweet Revenge

Connection Group Questions
SORRY: Playing with Revenge
November 23, 2008

Opening
This game is a little different. There is no way to win at the game of revenge and anger. Where as we want to play and win our other games- pursuing meaning, sex and money- we don’t want to play this game. We want to walk away from the table.
Share with the group your questions or personal struggles with revenge and anger. Have you ever sought revenge? What was the result? Have you held onto anger? How did that affect you? How did that affect those with whom you were angry? How did it affect other people in your life?

Digging Deeper
The bible talks a lot about this game of revenge and anger.
Read Ephesians 4: 25-32.
Review what this teaches us about anger and discuss:
Is anger a natural human emotion? Is it ever all right to be angry? In what ways or under what circumstances? What does it mean to command, “In your anger do not sin”?
What do you do with your anger: do you bottle it up, or spit it out? How can both be dangerous? Is there a better way to deal with it?

“A fool gives full vent to his anger but a wise person keeps himself under control (Proverbs 29:11).”

Why is it so important to not let the sun go down on a season of anger? Did you have a season of anger in your life? Has it crept into following seasons?

In the end the command is direct- “get rid of it.” It’s also understood in terms of Christ’s forgiveness. Why is it so vital to always view our lives, our emotions, and our relationships in light of Christ? How should the forgiveness we have in Christ guide the forgiveness we offer others?

If you have time: read Romans 12:17-21.
This is more directly related to the area of revenge, Discuss this rather difficult passage- “do not take revenge but leave room for God’s wrath.” Will God take revenge? Will He avenge? What will He avenge?

Closing
If the command is to get rid of it, let’s make sure we do just that. Within the comfort level of the group take time to share the following:

First, identify those with whom you are angry or seek revenge.

Second, identify why you want revenge or hold a grudge. What did they do to you or take from you?

Third, just get rid of it. If this means you’ll need to make a call, make the call. If it means you need to leave it before God, leave it with him. But whatever you do, don’t let the sun go down on another season of your life playing this game of revenge!

Monopoly: Playing with Money

Connection Group Questions Monopoly: Playing with Money November 16, 2008

Opening
We are not uncomfortable with the subject of money, but rather, the subject of OUR money- our income, our expenses, our debts, our spending habits.

If you have any, share some really amazing “spending” stories- something you bought that brought you joy, meaning and deep fulfillment. Or, share any spending stories that have brought you grief and regret.
Or, if you have any, share some really amazing “giving” stories- something or someone you blessed with your giving that brought you joy, meaning and fulfillment.

Digging Deeper
Within the group’s comfort level, discuss the subject of budgets. What were you taught about money growing up? How was it valued? How was it managed?
Talk about you own money matters. Do you have a budget? Do you know how much money comes in? Do you know
how much money goes out? Do you know where the money is going?

Jesus talks more about money than any other subject next to his mission. What do you currently think/believe that the bible teaches regarding money? Reference bible passages. What is the picture of money that emerges? Was Jesus pro or against money, or something else entirely?

Let’s look at Matthew 6:19-24
In the first section Jesus introduces an eternal perspective of “stuff.” What should we value, and what should we not? What perspective pre-occupies most of your time, thinking and decision-making?

In the second section Jesus talks about longings. What are looking at/longing for? How does this affect you? Can you think of any situations where your desire for more stuff detracted from a healthy view of life? Does the 10th Commandment shed any light on this?

In the third section, Jesus says his most famous money statement. Is it really this sever? Have you felt this tension in your life? What does a life of serving money, as compared to God, look like? How does your life compare?

Even Deeper Now!
A very simple plan to start winning the game of money was presented in worship:

• Give a minimum of 10%,
• save a minimum of 10%,
• live on and enjoy 80%.
• As time passes, increase the first two.

Is this totally unrealistic for your financial situation right now?
Would you even desire to manage your money this way?
If not, how do you desire to manage your money?
If this is appealing, what is it going to take to move in this direction, get there, and grow? What will have to stop? What will have to change? What habits must you break, and what habits must you start?

_____
Matthew Chapter 6:19-24

19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

22"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

24"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

The Game of Life: Twister!

November 9, 2008

Opening:
You can draw your own pig at http://drawapig.desktopcreatures.com/
Sex can be a very uncomfortable subject. (Especially here, since participants are encouraged to share about their own lives.) PLEASE do not feel obligated to reveal any more than you feel is comfortable or appropriate. Start the meeting by talking about some ground rules for the discussion, and commit to total confidentiality.

Digging Deeper:
We’ll start with an academic approach. Feel free to check out this article dealing with recent stats regarding sexual activity. And this one on sexual stats among adults.
Sex holds incredible power and prominence in our lives and culture. It’s often powerfully good, or powerfully bad. How can it go to such extremes?
What is the current status of sex in our culture: what is being said? What is being marketed? What is off limits? What is fair game? How do you respond to what might by called our
“over-sexed” society? How are people winning at the game of sex, and how are others losing in the very powerful game.

Now let’s uncover the very basics of what the bible teaches. Read Genesis 1:26-31.
How are humans like the rest of creation? How are we different (in this story)?
What is “the same” about men and women? What is different? Are both sexes needed to reflect the image of God? What is the image of God? Is God a sexual being?
If the story ended here, what would our sexual guidelines be?

Read Genesis 2:18-25.
What wasn’t good in creation? Why would a man need a helper (go ahead, have some fun with this one!)?
What is our connection to creation in this account (v. 19ff)? What does naming imply? Is God surprised that no suitable helper was found? What does God do? Why does God do it this way? Reflect on what this means for male female relationships. (Why the rib?)
What is the new morality outlined in this passage (23ff)?

Discuss George’s proposition regarding sex:
Babies and Bonding, that’s what it’s all about. What does the mean for us, for our relationships, for our marriages? Discuss the implications of the radically exclusive view of engaging in sexual relations?

Closing:
You’ve probably touched a few nerves in your discussion. It may have been more academic, or perhaps some have shared from their experiences. Within the group’s comfort level, discuss how people are winning in the game of sex, and how they are losing. How can we turn the table on the game and play in a way that brings out the real blessings of our sexuality?

_____

Genesis 1:26-28

26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, [b] and over all the creatures that move along the ground."

27 So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.

28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."


Genesis 2:20-25
But for Adam [g] no suitable helper was found. 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs [h] and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib [i] he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

23 The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called 'woman, [j] '
for she was taken out of man."

24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

The Game of LIFE: BUNCO!

bun·co also bun·ko (bung' ko)
n. pl. bun·cos, also bun·kos
1. A swindle in which an unsuspecting person is cheated; a confidence game.
2. A parlor game played in teams with three dice.
3. A winning throw in the above game; three of a kind of a specified number.

[Probably alteration of Spanish banca, card game, from Italian banca, bank, of Germanic origin.].

Groups are encouraged to plan a games night this month!

I recently discovered BUNCO! It's a blast, made for 12 people, and perfect for Connection Groups. A round takes about 2 hours. Check out this site and read the rules!

Strictly speaking, Bunco is a game of dice, played in rounds. Players take turns rolling the dice and trying to accumulate as many points as possible to win each round. The game is played at tables of four in competing teams of two.

Players score points by rolling three dice and trying to match the number they're supposed to roll for that round. They get a point for each die that rolls the number, and if all three roll the number they score 21 points. They also score 5 points for rolling three of a kind of any other number. They get to keep rolling as long as they score one or more points with each roll. Once they fail to score they pass the dice to their left and the opposing team gets a chance to score.

During each round the teams at the Head Table try to score 21 points. The first team to score 21 points wins the round and play stops. At all other tables play stops when the Head Table play stops and the team with the highest score at each lower table wins the round.

At the end of the round players change seats, the winners at each of the lower tables move up a table, and the losers at the head table move to the lowest table. Players also switch partners at the end of the round, so you never play with the same partner twice in a row.

During play, players track the number of rounds they win and lose as a team, and the number of Buncos scored individually, on their personal scorecard. At the end of the night wins/losses and Buncos are tallied and prizes awarded.

Right.

Now we're going to tell you the truth... Bunco is a social event. It's a party. It's a blast! Twelve of us get together once a month, leaving the cares and worries behind, and leaving the kids with their fathers or baby-sitters.

We fall off our diets, snacking on M&Ms, Chex-Mix, or anything else we can get our hands on. We have appetizers, a (usually) delicious dinner, and seconds on dessert. We drink our favorite spritzer, Chardonnay, or Drink-of-the-night, and we talk.

We talk about our kids. About the neighbors. About anyone who didn't show up. About our husbands, our jobs, their jobs, the builder in our community, TV shows, current events, and anything else that might tickle our fancy.

Oh yeah, and we play a silly, mindless dice game with wild abandon, hoping to take home a few more sheckles then we arrived with.

Now that's Bunco.